AWW 2015-24: AWA (formerly AWW) FATBURN IN BENSAFRIM, WEDNESDAY 19 JANUARY, 2019

AWA (formerly AWW) FATBURN IN BENSAFRIM, WEDNESDAY 19 JANUARY, 2019

I had tried to get Jim to blog this directly, but had never heard such a litany of excuses along the lines of ( "sorry sir, the dog eat my homework") ; first it was Gill's photos being too big, then her cloud being too full, then his ipad not charging properly, you name it! Anyway , in the spirit of helpful co-operation, here are his words and Gill's photos for your edification....Geoff/editor/co-ordinator/etc)

ROLL CALL

Geoff & Sue, Russell & Linda, Sue M, Ros, Isobel, Martin, Kim, Terry M, Steve & Margaret, Terry & Pat, John, Tony, David, Jim & Gill, ...whose missing... Ah hem...Nicholas!

SANS ST NICHOLAS

QUESTION: IS THE ABOVE PHOTO A METAPHOR FOR -

a) the condition of Mother Theresa's Brexit Plan

b) the fat left on the bodies of the renamed AWA (Algarve Wednesday Athletes)

THE EVENT - HOW DID WE DO?

Remarkably, 20 participants were not put off by the leaders invitation.
19 off, turned up on, or well ahead of the start time of 10.00hrs

One off, Nicholas, dropped in at 10.05hrs!!!

Throughout the day he offered as an excuse to anyone who would listen, that it was a sat navy problem..., but rumour has it that on arrival, he might have been overheard saying, "...shi*, I thought they would have been gone by now!"

Disciplinary process has begun and Nicholas awaits the judgement to be handed down by our Great Coordinator, sometime also referred to as the Grand Inquisitor! (Think he was punished enough, left sitting by the pharmacy looking forlorn as we all left , waiting for Dolores to arrive and hoping that the sat navy would work the second time...ed).

As we set off, the weather was in tune with a Scottish noir, cool, dank, damp and threatening.

It sort of dried out as we went along but throughout the day, we were blessed with what most had not seen in 2019 - clouds!

DISTANCE: a good 20kms

TIME:
A new world record for this route at just under 5 hours including lunch and banana stops. We set off at a season's best, a truly blistering pace of 5.2kms per hour and overall achieved a walking rate of 4.5kms per hour, putting all athletes (no longer just walkers) in line for international selection, except unfortunately Nicholas, whose time cannot count due to his late arrival!

DROP OUT: None

ELEVATION: Under 600 metres, so perhaps the invitation bark was worse than the bite?

LARD LOSS: A total of 31kgs, equivalent to 1.55kgs per participant! Wow! (This matter is the subject of investigation by our fatcheck team following fake news accusations).(Personally , think Jim needs to be prosceuted under the Trades Description Act....I put on 1.4lbs that day and, before Sue M says so, it can't have all been that Pingo Doce baguette...ed.)

ACHIEVEMENTS VERSUS INVITATION CRITERIA
YES: purple heather
white heather club
Andy Stewart & Moira Anderson in your ear?
Quinta da Escosia!
coos
goats

NO: January sunshine
twa border collie dugs
dancing in the streets *(see note below)

ATHLETIC ACHIEVEMENT AWARD: Linda

At the end of the walk, Linda completed the Bensafrim public park trim track exercise circuit!
While her activities were witnessed, unfortunately there is no photographic or video record as the Grandstand film crew had already retired to the bar!

*note from above
Linda's athletic performance is being considered by the Scottish and English negotiating teams based on equivalence arguments in terms of "dancing in the streets"

FINALLY THE TOWER

Less than one hour in, our leader pointed out a distant tower which he indicated would be a reference point throughout the day. At lunch he claimed it was again within site? Many agreed - although it seems likely that most were just pretending to see it, as evidenced by the multi directional pointing at distant horizons!

Questions were asked if there was any prospect of us getting up close and personal with the tower. Much later, after any number of stiff ascents, the tower indeed beckoned much closer. It seemed just a hop,step and jump away, but each time we closed, another false summit awaited.

Eventually we made it but in doing so and for the first time, front to back of the group stretched to maybe half a kilometre - everything was working as planned, smoke was rising and you could almost smell bbq fat burn!

( I was bringing up the rear on the tower approach and commenting on a particularly stony patch that almost seem to be bruising my feet : Isabel disagreed, saying it was an excellent free reflexology treatment!...ed)

After a tower touching ceremony, we merrily skipped off down to Bensafrim where we were invited to enter the "members only" Bensafrim Sports and Social Club, of which it appears our leader is a member?